It's always good to see the individuals in our community rallying around a good cause, and the efforts to pay for the restoration of the Rainbow sign is just that type of cause.
This past Sunday, a fundraising benefit was held at Georgie's Bar to raise more money for Project Rainbow, a project at the hands of the Asbury Park Historical Society. This latest benefit, a combination of Bingo, Name That Tune and trivia questions, kept everyone entertained. Sponsored by Vail Realty and hosted by David Hoffman and Lady Marisa, the event was successful.
I'm hoping that the monetary goal is reached soon. The project's initial goal, according to their website, "We have hired a neon sign restorer, Robbie Ingui, from Artistic Neon Inc. in Ridgewood, New York. He will complete the sign restoration in four stages. When completed, The City of Asbury Park will provide the expertise to hang the sign in its new home in the Transportation Center. The total cost to complete the project is $15,000. Our goal is to complete and hang the sign by Summer 2012. ...We have one more fundraising event planned for the month of November."
As the monetary goal to finish paying for the sign's restoration comes closer to being reached, I'm hopeful that we as a community can dig in our pockets a little deeper and get this accomplished.
I was very surprised when my lucky raffle ticket was called as the winner of a cash prize in the amount of $125. So as I gave the money directly back to the cause, I feel somewhat satisfied that I helped get us a little closer. My goal is to donate more money, and I'm hoping that all of us in the community give a little money - those who are in a position to do so.
It's no secret that money is tight. But I was joking with someone later that evening after the benefit that we really need to reach this goal sooner rather than later because it just doesn't seem like it's an exorbitant amount of money ... and also, how many more benefits will be needed for this?
Come on people, we got this, right?
Let's ban together and get this the final funding to pay off the sign's restoration. Doesn't it seem like the individuals trying to get this project completed have been trying to get the funding forever? I know that's a gross exaggeration, but it just seem like it's been a long time.
A lot of people in the community, most notably Carol Torre, have been doing so much to attain this monetary amount, and I'm just hopeful that by the end of 2012 the financial goal will be reached.
Let's get this done!
And see, I even took a break from any romantic tales of woe, and I even steered clear of coming down hard on some of the tragic characters that have made Asbury Park a nice place to visit - and live - all to devote this blog entry to this worthy cause.
(P.S. - Don't worry, tomorrow I'll be back to normal and shedding light on the crazy, offbeat and even the sweet-natured situations that make this city a goldmine!)
Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Saturday, August 18, 2012
I'm ready for this relationship ... but is the object of my affections ready?
In the gay community, it's so difficult to grab and hold onto a relationship. So after taking some time off from any relationships, I'm ready to embark on a new one. Hell, I'm more than ready ... I'm exploding!
A departed queen from long ago has recently re-entered my life and is ready to rekindle a relationship with me. That's what he says he wants.
The last time, although we cared for each other, it just wasn't the right time for us to go full-steam ahead. I was ready, but I think he knew that although his heart was saying "take the plunge", his head was telling him to ignore the yield sign but not the stop sign. So he eventually told me that he knew I wasn't ready for the relationship.
I knew that he was right, but I didn't want to admit it. He knew that I had to experience all that the gay community had to throw at me - good and bad. So he let me go.
This was years ago. Since then, I had three other serious relationships. As I mentioned in past blogs, the first one was a struggle since he was an addict (and I was too naive to realize how tragic his situation really was) and I gave to much and received less than enough in return; the second one was a learning experience because I had to realize that giving 100 percent to a relationship while the other man is giving 25 percent, it's impossible to make it work; and the third relationship, well, I had to understand that some people really are dishonest about themselves right from the start of a relationship.
Looking back, I'm glad that I had the opportunity to learn these lessons because it has put me in the right position to love a man and let that man meet me half way. So for me, I'm more than ready for this relationship. I've put in my dues - and then some.
I have a fear nagging at my soul, though. I know that this man wants me, and I know this man cares about me and wants only the best for me. But my fear is that he will not have enough time to devote to making this relationship work. He insists that he will, but I've learned the hard way - actually from my parents - that when a man is enthralled in business and is a powerful executive in his dealings, that the other person ends up taking a backseat.
I'm sure this is just my fear of losing this man talking to my subconscious. I mean, if he wants to make this relationship finally work and he's in it for the long haul this time I should just forget my nagging feelings, right?
I've just always given 100 percent and have been disappointed in the past, every time in the past. So in my mind, I'm just thinking how can this time be any different? He's successful in business, but in relationships I think they have taken a backseat. I know that he wants so badly to change all that and focus on the relationship. But is that possible?
I really care about this man, and I've finally got a guy who wants to be with me - for better or worse.
I'm probably thinking too much. It wouldn't be the first time; I'm always too analytical. They do have a 12-step program for that, right?
A departed queen from long ago has recently re-entered my life and is ready to rekindle a relationship with me. That's what he says he wants.
The last time, although we cared for each other, it just wasn't the right time for us to go full-steam ahead. I was ready, but I think he knew that although his heart was saying "take the plunge", his head was telling him to ignore the yield sign but not the stop sign. So he eventually told me that he knew I wasn't ready for the relationship.
I knew that he was right, but I didn't want to admit it. He knew that I had to experience all that the gay community had to throw at me - good and bad. So he let me go.
This was years ago. Since then, I had three other serious relationships. As I mentioned in past blogs, the first one was a struggle since he was an addict (and I was too naive to realize how tragic his situation really was) and I gave to much and received less than enough in return; the second one was a learning experience because I had to realize that giving 100 percent to a relationship while the other man is giving 25 percent, it's impossible to make it work; and the third relationship, well, I had to understand that some people really are dishonest about themselves right from the start of a relationship.
Looking back, I'm glad that I had the opportunity to learn these lessons because it has put me in the right position to love a man and let that man meet me half way. So for me, I'm more than ready for this relationship. I've put in my dues - and then some.
I have a fear nagging at my soul, though. I know that this man wants me, and I know this man cares about me and wants only the best for me. But my fear is that he will not have enough time to devote to making this relationship work. He insists that he will, but I've learned the hard way - actually from my parents - that when a man is enthralled in business and is a powerful executive in his dealings, that the other person ends up taking a backseat.
I'm sure this is just my fear of losing this man talking to my subconscious. I mean, if he wants to make this relationship finally work and he's in it for the long haul this time I should just forget my nagging feelings, right?
I've just always given 100 percent and have been disappointed in the past, every time in the past. So in my mind, I'm just thinking how can this time be any different? He's successful in business, but in relationships I think they have taken a backseat. I know that he wants so badly to change all that and focus on the relationship. But is that possible?
I really care about this man, and I've finally got a guy who wants to be with me - for better or worse.
I'm probably thinking too much. It wouldn't be the first time; I'm always too analytical. They do have a 12-step program for that, right?
Wednesday, August 15, 2012
Hey twink, you've got years to grow before reaching your elders' level
Every now and again, something I encounter in the gay community really cracks me the hell up.
Now most people who know me are well aware that I love to laugh, even at things that are not really politically correct.
But I seem to always encounter a particular person in the gay community who just boggles my mind. I am always so glad and fortunate when the young gayz come into their own and are able to express themselves by finding their space in the community - and their own skin.
And as I've come into my own in the gay community, I've always thanked my older gayz who have paved the way for me and have taken me under their wing and made me feel comfortable.
So I've always tried to do the same. But I think there are some young gayz, admirably called "twinks", who are just out of control. A few of them need to brace themselves and not make an overt effort to show others that they are seasoned in the community, when it's painfully obvious they are not.
Don't get me wrong - I love the young ones who are finding their own in the community. But please, I beg of you - don't try to step over the older ones who have made it easier for you to be your grand 'ol gay self! And above all else, don't make a feeble effort to throw shade and be disrespectful.
This past Sunday, I turned 44. And I'm proud of it because I don't look it. Thankfully, black don't crack! I was treated on my birthday by having to suffer through a rowdy group of twinks demonstrating how tragic they could be. Now at first I loved seeing their enthusiasm. But as the night progressed, their obnoxious nature just grated on my nerves.
So my friend and I figured it was time to show them how being fabulous, honoring the true divas in song and on stage, should be done. I think showing them how it should be done caused gthem to retreat and leave. Mission accomplished, and let's hope they figure out how to truly honor the musical divas who us gayz have loved for years and years. I'm sure they will; I have faith in them ... I think.
But actually, the catalyst for this blog entry was not only the group I've mentioned. It was my encounter with a tragic twink who continually prances around Club Paradise and Georgie's (two established gay establishments) like he's been here for decades. He hasn't earned his stripes yet.
What made me chuckle was that he had "relations" with my friend, and for some reason he thought this made him part of MY world. No, sadly young buck, it doesn't. So after running into him a couple times later and briefly saying "hi" to me, he got upset that his name wasn't drilled into my head.
Really??? He told me his name in passing, and me - having a couple (or few) martinis, I had no idea what he said his name was. I mean, young twink, you didn't have sex with me, so did I really need to remember your name?
So he storms off in a huff, all pissed at me that I didn't remember his name. I just broke out in laughter because if he wanted to know how I had remembered him, he would have been really upset. The reason - I'd been referring to him as "Bookbag boy", and if he wanted me to call him that when he questioned me about his name, I sure enough would have done it.
Lesson to the young gayz under 23 trying to find their own way in the community - don't think that you've put in enough time in the struggle for gay equality and redemption to step to the older gayz, 'cause you haven't.
Your time will come ... just hold your horses, earn the respect and learn from your elders.
Now most people who know me are well aware that I love to laugh, even at things that are not really politically correct.
But I seem to always encounter a particular person in the gay community who just boggles my mind. I am always so glad and fortunate when the young gayz come into their own and are able to express themselves by finding their space in the community - and their own skin.
And as I've come into my own in the gay community, I've always thanked my older gayz who have paved the way for me and have taken me under their wing and made me feel comfortable.
So I've always tried to do the same. But I think there are some young gayz, admirably called "twinks", who are just out of control. A few of them need to brace themselves and not make an overt effort to show others that they are seasoned in the community, when it's painfully obvious they are not.
Don't get me wrong - I love the young ones who are finding their own in the community. But please, I beg of you - don't try to step over the older ones who have made it easier for you to be your grand 'ol gay self! And above all else, don't make a feeble effort to throw shade and be disrespectful.
This past Sunday, I turned 44. And I'm proud of it because I don't look it. Thankfully, black don't crack! I was treated on my birthday by having to suffer through a rowdy group of twinks demonstrating how tragic they could be. Now at first I loved seeing their enthusiasm. But as the night progressed, their obnoxious nature just grated on my nerves.
So my friend and I figured it was time to show them how being fabulous, honoring the true divas in song and on stage, should be done. I think showing them how it should be done caused gthem to retreat and leave. Mission accomplished, and let's hope they figure out how to truly honor the musical divas who us gayz have loved for years and years. I'm sure they will; I have faith in them ... I think.
But actually, the catalyst for this blog entry was not only the group I've mentioned. It was my encounter with a tragic twink who continually prances around Club Paradise and Georgie's (two established gay establishments) like he's been here for decades. He hasn't earned his stripes yet.
What made me chuckle was that he had "relations" with my friend, and for some reason he thought this made him part of MY world. No, sadly young buck, it doesn't. So after running into him a couple times later and briefly saying "hi" to me, he got upset that his name wasn't drilled into my head.
Really??? He told me his name in passing, and me - having a couple (or few) martinis, I had no idea what he said his name was. I mean, young twink, you didn't have sex with me, so did I really need to remember your name?
So he storms off in a huff, all pissed at me that I didn't remember his name. I just broke out in laughter because if he wanted to know how I had remembered him, he would have been really upset. The reason - I'd been referring to him as "Bookbag boy", and if he wanted me to call him that when he questioned me about his name, I sure enough would have done it.
Lesson to the young gayz under 23 trying to find their own way in the community - don't think that you've put in enough time in the struggle for gay equality and redemption to step to the older gayz, 'cause you haven't.
Your time will come ... just hold your horses, earn the respect and learn from your elders.
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